Appoint a friend to pre-schedule a rotation of five to fifteen helpers

Even if you have very little time before your heart surgery, organize a Home Team before you go in. And if you are just home from the hospital, it's not too late. Make a list of up to fifteen people, family and friends (but not your primary caregiver) who would be glad - even honored - to be called to help out. Pick a leader among these friends and engage her or him to contact the others about the tasks ahead. Set up a revolving schedule of assignments for your first three to four weeks at home.

A friend? Why not your caregiver?

Who will your primary caregiver be -- your spouse, your partner, a friend, another family member? The scenario is this. Suddenly your caregiver, your close personal ally, has the extended responsibility for all previously shared arrangements - nursing aid, household tasks, transportation, medical and social plan coordination. This is why you line up a Home Team to pitch in. Your primary caregiver needs assistance and taking care of too. Once you are home and recovering, he or she is now "on ? 24/7. He or she also needs continuing acknowledgment, appreciation and love from you. Plan to regularly express your gratitude. Find out how s/he is feeling - every day. Though sometimes you won't feel like it, remember to smile, and show you care!

Five basic tasks to assign

1. Dinner nightly

Some friends will like to prepare a home cooked meal for both patient and caregiver, while others can pick up a heart healthy take-out meal. Since the reality of landing back home means the primary caregiver has antenna focused on you continuously, your caregiver loved one will appreciate the sit-down break at dinner time.

2. Buddy system

During the many hours and days of convalescence, neither patient nor primary caregiver wants to feel isolated at home. Anticipate a buddy system in advance. Is there a friend who has been though open heart surgery who will agree to check in with the patient regularly? Whom the heart patient can call spontaneously? Many smaller questions can be answered this way, by a friend or family member. Naturally, any substantial recovery question requires picking up the phone and calling your designated medical professional. Maybe you know, or know of, a former heart patient who also is a medical professional? Arrange chat times (perhaps twice weekly) with him or her. Primary caregiver and patient should also plan regular phone time with a best friend independently, to be free to let their hair down to tell it like it is!

3. Running errands

Who - friend or neighbor - would be willing to be counted on to run to the pharmacy? To deposit or pick up laundry or dry cleaning? To shop for staples at the supermarket? To buy a box of thank-you notes? Recruit a list of volunteers beforehand.

4. Housekeeping

In the hospital take-home instructions, there are very specific physical directives that must be honored while the sternum (breastbone) is healing. You are not to lift more than five to ten pounds for four to six weeks. As well, you are to avoid pushing/pulling activities with your arms, and also avoid heavy one-armed lifting for three months. This eliminates carrying groceries, carrying a toddler, vacuuming, shoveling snow, mowing the lawn, raking leaves - even wiping up a kitchen counter with a sponge can be challenging in the first couple of weeks. So best schedule others for regular housekeeping duties for at least four to six weeks and/or consider hiring a house cleaner for the short term.

5. Chauffeuring

An open heart patient may not resume driving for six to eight weeks - until the sternum is fully healed. Because you don't want to risk re-injuring the sternum should a passenger airbag need to be deployed, you'll be expected to ride in the back seat using the shoulder seat belt. That said, you can ride in a car as soon as you're home - to a medical appointment, to the store, to eat out. However, all these outings become a lot of driving for the primary caregiver, so line up chauffeur volunteers!

Excerpted from the forthcoming book, OPEN HEART COACH: The Heart Surgery Home Recovery Planner For Patients and Caregivers by open-heart surgery thriver Maggie Lichtenberg, PCC. Foreword by Kathleen Blake, MD.

Copyright 2005 by Maggie Lichtenberg. All Rights Reserved.