What happened to 2005? Didnt we just have Christmas and New Years? Im still processing what happened at Christmas 2004!

Last year I discovered that there are LifeSaver candy canes and precooked half turkeys. I also noticed that the ornaments and decorations that I have been buying for the last few years has grown into quite a collection. Major projects had been completed before the holiday break and I wasnt pressed for time. I could decorate my house and enjoy my Christmas tree.

I could send out my holiday greeting cards on time and in the right spirit. Christmas 2004 was the first time I managed to pull off the whole thing without a hitch. Even as a single person, I could have a full, unique holiday season with dignity. My life would never be the same.

In 2004, I was able to accept and decline invitations with my head held high. I had my own plans. Things to do, people to see, a nativity scene with a little light to turn on when the sun went down. Sympathy wasnt necessary. I was not a prodigal, but an independent woman making her own traditions.

During a flight back from one of our external campuses, I gave my seat to a little girl so she could get a sky view of the Christmas lights in Lubbock. The magic of Christmas and the magic of childhood are made for each other.

My growing collection of Christmas sweaters allowed me to dress the part for a week and a half leading to the holiday. One of my resolutions was to have enough sweaters for two weeks in 2005. Some day I would have a different sweater for each day of December. Reindeers, bells, sleighs, snowmen, I was open to all of the options. I found out that velour was much easier to maintain than velvet. I rediscovered my love of fur collars. There is a whole section in the closet just for sparkly stuff. Who knew the holidays had so many levels and facets? I could handle it!

I was feeling really good about myself, then something happened. In fact, a lot of things happened. The next thing I knew it was time to do it all again. I picked up my Halloween candy at Family Dollar this year and found it next to Santa Claus mugs. The season for pumpkins and orange, fall leaves lasted about a week! It was time to talk turkeys again and choose recipes for the annual covered dish parties. People were already wearing their holiday sweaters and ties!

The drive back from Dallas this Thanksgiving left me tired. The tradition of decorating the house over the Thanksgiving weekend could be put off until 2006. After all, its just me here and I dont mind. It wont hurt anything to put the tree up the next weekend. I noticed something on the news about sending out holiday cards in time for Christmas. My impression is that you have around ten days to work with. I put my address book on standby.

Then I got an email from Amazon.com. They offer free shipping and guaranteed delivery before Christmas if I order by mid-December. They used to just sell books, now they sell everything. Cool, one stop shopping and I still have a week or two to work it out.

I have a two week break for the holiday and a major project to finish. Maybe I can play Christmas music in the background. This year is not working out like I thought.

Other people seem to be on top of things. The lights are up, the music is playing and the Christmas spirit is everywhere. I saw a Happy Birthday, Jesus sign that gave me some perspective. It is not about me and how many traditions I can manage from year to year. It is about celebrating what we believe. My beliefs about the routines that make Christmas official are officially bogus. Ill be lucky to get half as much done as I did in 2005, but I will celebrate anyway.